Thunder cracked through clear skies the day Shaun Tomson's friend walked into that hospital room, claiming to have a message from Matthew. One bolt of lightning, no clouds in sight. For Tomson, who'd spent decades mastering the art of showing no weakness, it was the universe's way of saying: let go.
"First is first and second is nothing."
That's how Shaun Tomson saw the world as a '77 world champion. Victory meant silence. Strength meant swallowing loss. In professional surfing's golden era, champions like Tomson, Ian Cairns, and Rabbit Bartholomew wore masks of invincibility. You'd never see tears after a heat loss - just a firm handshake and the silent promise of revenge.
Then his 15-year-old son, Matthew, died.
The champion who never showed pain found himself in a hospital room, watching his wife collapse under grief. The competitive fire that drove him through two decades meant nothing now.
In our final Raw File from our mental health chapter, Tomson speaks about what the ocean taught him after Matthew's death. How writing twelve lines that start with "I will" became his way back to light.
These same lines now shake prison inmates to tears and give burned out execs and lost kids direction - not through motivation or self-help mantras, but through the simple power of putting your truth on paper.
From the highest of highs to the bottom of a dark empty pit, Shaun Tomson reveals how his journey mirrors professional surfing's evolution - from a period of forced stoicism to one where champions like Filipe Toledo or Steph Gilmore openly step away to protect their mental health.
Finding strength in our darkest moments seems so utterly impossible, but sometimes the only way forward is to let others see you break.
If you haven’t listened to Chapter 5 - Mental Health yet, you can do it here
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